The other day someone was telling me about a friend that she had busted talking to herself. I was surprised that she thought it so odd. I thought to myself, “is that weird?”

To be honest, I’ve long indulged in the self-dialectic, as I like to call it, and long realized that there isn’t much I can do about it. It’s like anger. You can fight it, maybe even stave it off for long periods, but if you’re an angry SOB, it’s gonna leak out eventually. Same with the self-dialectic; if I’m gonna have a conversation with myself, it’s gonna happen. Where this comes from I’ll never understand, but it has to run it’s course. Fortunately in today’s ear-budded world, it seems like nearly everyone is talking to themselves, right there in public, as they pull brownie mix off the shelves at Publix, when they are just talking to someone on the other end of the wireless grid. So I have learned to “factor in” my disability, fighting to appear as normal as possible on the surface, by putting in an ear-bud whenever I catch the impulse to have a little self-chat.

Now there are different categories of talking to oneself that range in their utility and healthfulness. The imagined conversation with a work nemesis or outright enemy, like King Ass-Clown Bill O’Reilly, is pretty pointless, and will just sap you of energy. It may be useful however to brush up on your talking points, if you think you will be getting into a political shouting match with your retarded Christian family anytime soon. I would recommend avoiding emotion. Use it to practice important conversations you need to have, or speeches. Think practice, not vengeance.

Oh, and if you are stealing cars and begin to talk to yourself, make sure it’s not a bait car.

This entry was posted on Monday, January 30th, 2006 at 12:01 am and is filed under general, musings. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.