Ban the Stupids

The culture Nazis are at it again, promising to save you from your fat selves, and NYC is leading the pack.

Last week alone, New York City banned the use of trans fats in restaurant meals, and an Ohio law passed in November that bans smoking in virtually all business establishments (even in company-owned vehicles such as trailer-truck cabs) went into effect. However different the actions may seem on the surface, they share something all too common in today’s America: They rob us of the right to make decisions–however stupid, unwise or repugnant to refined sensibilities–about how we want to live, work and eat.

Most important, these bans reduce all of us to the status of children, incapable of making informed choices. Is it quaint to suggest that there’s something wrong with that in a country founded on the idea of the individual’s rights to life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness?

Now if we can come together as collective buffoons and “ban” supposedly legal items or actions, what’s the distinction between legal and illegal in the first place? The ways we deceptively suppress freedom and individual choice in a country that was founded to protect these things never ceases to amaze me.

I’ve got an idea. Let’s ban stupidity. No more stupids, stupid thoughts, stupid words, anywhere, ever. Ok? Ah, I can breath freer already….