manunderstress.com

We know why you wouldn’t watch the Tour de France, but don’t forget about the wipeouts. And in case you weren’t aware, Lance Armstrong twitters. Oh the excitement.

What’s worse than a man-child? A child-man. The new face of the Republican party:

I’m a big fan of online chat vs. telephone when it comes to dealing with account shit. Here I try and get the bank to drop some overdrafts, having some good fun with it. This dude was hilarious.

Parker: After reviewing your account, I see that your account was assessed with the overdraft fee correctly and no banking error occured.
You: true, there were several overdrafts. i am asking that perhaps you can find a soft spot in your heart and remove some of them since I am a long standing customer.
Parker: Your satisfaction is of highest priority for me. I am trying my best to help you resolve this issue.
You: thanks. i made a mistake and i am sorry for it.
Parker: I will give you my honest best efforts realizing your situation and considering your valued relationship with us.
Parker: I understand you, however it is my job to trust my system and allow a refund only for a banking error, however as a human it is also my responsibility to help you.
Parker: After reviewing your account history and valued relationship with Bank of America, I am able to refund $70.00 as Courtesy.
You: thanks for being a human and helping the humans over the machines.
Parker: I seriously imagined myself in your place and trusted you, also I expect you would place yourself in my place and realize that it’s not easy to make a refund if the bank does not authorize it.
You: your empathy is outstanding. it is true, refunds must be difficult, since the banks made some bad bets and certainly need all the
money they can get.
Parker: Yes, and I found you a very nice human being Charles.
Parker: Also, I expect you would not overdraw your account in future.
You: but i am confident that our government will bail them out with taxpayer money and save us all
You: i will not make this mistake again. i have learned my lesson, Parker. already i am punished for it.
Parker: Definitely! We all would be happy and back where we were 2 years ago.
Parker: I have submitted the request for the fee refund and the same you will be able to view under the pending section, once you refresh your account.
Parker: I hope I was quick?
You: thanks. you were great. the best ever. faster than a machine.
Parker: You’re welcome. I was happy to help you.
Parker: Have a great day ahead. I am sure it is going to be bright day for you and I hope it gets brighter for you everyday.
Parker: Thank you for being a wonderful customer and giving me an opportunity to assist you. I hope I again get a chance to assist you in future !

My latest waste of time obsession is creating ecards on someecards.com. I had no idea that you could design your own. Good fun.

A recent comment spam I thought I should share. I confess to being very intrigued.

She neck sings, “Let’s configuration a flick case in point blocking, infant,” on the Rockwilder-produced run to mum , although don’t chronometer a Kelis sex pickle to hit the Internet anytime soon. “It’s ably-wishing of like a misunderstanding CD,” the chorister said recently. “It’s place of wide being nothing but congenial with yourself in establish, which is an top-spread out up till ambition, markedly in the corporation we’re in.

I walk into Lowes today to obtain materials with which to wage massive war upon the squirrel population living in my attic, and these two little girls are sitting in the entrance rapping a song in tandem. I hear Obama and McCain mentioned. I ask them what it’s all about and they went on about their school doing it and being on the Today Show or Good Morning America or some such thing. This is the video for it. Seeing the full production I am speechless.

Holy Jesus, I think I have found my calling as corporate guerrilla ironist.

In a typical event, a few brave people volunteer to “present” a random deck of slides pulled off the Web, or borrowed from friends or employers. (I first heard about PowerPoint Karaoke when an organizer asked if she could use a deck I had presented on word meanings.) The audience laughs, cheers, and yells out suggestions as the presenters gamely struggle to link one slide to the next, transforming something that probably started life as a tedious corporate monologue into a five-minute flight of creative irony.

Although for long I’ve been envisioning something riffing on the absurdity of the conference call…

You’ve all probably seen these by now, but I’ve been in the studio the last two weekends, which makes them all the more punishingly funny. The most surreal and artfully decomposed mock-ups of all time perhaps. This is the Maiden one, the Metallica is also curl up on the floor funny. Wired put them up because Youtube took them down. This almost erases the pain of un-super Tuesday.